Goalbits

  "Don't touch the stove, it's hot." "Don't run in to the road, there are cars." "Don't mess this up." "Don't trip as you walk down the aisle with everyone watching." We have a bias for the negative. Partly it is your brain trying to keep you alive. The amygdala has two thirds of its neurons wired for negative inputs. Studies have found that people are more likely to make a decision based on avoiding something bad than to get something good. It is also partly social conditioning too. All our lives we hear negatives. Our parents tell us not to touch the stove. Our teachers tell us not to talk in class. Our bosses tell us not to be late. Here is the problem - after being told "don't do that" people don't actually know what they should do. You can't do a "don't." Telling someone "don't" isn't actually helpful. It is actually unclear. So what can you do? My first suggestion wou...

  Numerous studies have shown that expressing gratitude on a regular basis will measurably improve happiness. When you start a practice of gratitude it can be hard to think of things to be grateful for. As with everything in life, the more you do it the easier it becomes. Here is a list of things you can be grateful for to help you get started.  1. Health.  If you are healthy, be grateful for that. If your health isn’t perfect, be grateful for the ailments you don’t have. 2. Hearing.  Be grateful you still have your hearing. 3. Sight.  Be grateful you can see. 4. Waking up.  Be grateful you woke up today. 5. Healthcare.  Be grateful you live somewhere with access to healthcare. 6. Children.  Be grateful for your children. 7. Friends.  Be grateful you have friends. 8. Parents.  If your parents are still alive, be grateful for them. 9. Pets.  If you have a pet, be grateful for the unconditional love they give you. 10. Weekends.  ...

  Goals Goalbits are GOAL-based habits. The goal part is as important as the habit. Your goal should give you a "why" or a reason to persevere with your habit. Your goal should be something YOU want to change not something someone else thinks you should change. Your goal could be to lose weight, or get fit, or save money. But why do you want to do these things? Because you think you are too heavy, too unfit or dont save enough. I would say these are the little "whys." They are certainly objectives you want to meet but weight, fitness or money are not the real “Big Why.” Bigs Whys Believe it or not, behind every goal is the same Big Why. That Big Why is to be happier. You think you will be happier then you are thinner. You think you will be happier when you are fitter. You think you will be happier when you have more savings. The truth is this may or may not be true. If you lose your goal weight and say, well I if I could just lose a little more weight then I will be...

There is a saying - “every day may not be good, but there is good in everyday.” But is that true even during challenging times like a global pandemic? I’ll be honest, I used to think gratitude was some airy fairy rubbish. I want to share a personal story however that suggests there might be something to this gratitude thing. A personal story. In 2009, after our second round of Invitro Fertilization, my wife became pregnant with twins. (The first round a few years before was very successful and resulted in our daughter Grace.) At the 4 month ultrasound, the one where they tell you if you should paint the nursery blue or pink, we learnt that one of the boys was healthy but the other had a serious birth defect. If he lived to full term then he might only be with us for a few minutes or a few hours. We were referred to the High Risk Pregnancy Team at our hospital. We were also assigned a Genetic Counselor who explained my sons condition and what our options were. My son had a condition cal...

One of the best ways to boost your happiness is to get in to the habit of going for a Good Walk.

Having a bad day? What can you do in 1 minute to boost your happiness? It turns out there are several things! 1. Smile. This is a case of faking it until you make it. Researchers have found that smiling makes you happier. Spend one minute smiling and you will be happier when you are finished. 2. Laugh. Find something that makes you laugh. Read a joke book. Watch a funny cat video online. Have a one minute dance party. Laughing makes people happier. 3. Sun. Go stand outside in the sun for a minute. Lack of sunlight makes people sad. Getting outside to some natural sunlight will give your mood a boost. 4. Meditate. Hundreds of studies have shown the benefits of meditation. Frequency is more important than duration. Meditating one minute every day is better that meditating for seven minutes once a week. Sit up straight and breath in through your nose and out through your mouth for the count of twelve and boom you are done. 5. Gratitude. Practicing gratitude is another proven way to boost ...

Introduction to Bullet Journals A Bullet Journal (“BuJo” for short) is a versatile tool that can be used as a todo list, a diary, a planner and much more. The idea of a Bullet Journal was created by a New York Designer named Ryder Carroll. It was created as a simple way to “help you track the past, organize the present, and plan for the future.” It is a flexible tool that can be adapted to each person. A Bullet Journal differs from a traditional diary. It is a quick and dirty way to capture information and is not intended for consumption by anyone other than the author. It should only take a couple of minutes a day to complete. Instead of writing long paragraphs you use symbols to designate the content type and then just write a sentence or two. You can learn more about about Bullet Journals at the official website . Bullet Journals are typically “analog” (written in a good old fashioned paper book.) However you can use whatever tool works best for you. You can use index cards, a W...

Here are 25 proven ways to boost your mood. Drink a glass of water as soon as you get up in the morning to start rehydrating your body. Eat meals at the same time everyday to maintain consistent blood sugar levels. Have protein for breakfast to give yourself good fuel to start the day. Reduce your caffeine intake to control your hydration. Choose water over sugary drinks to maintain your blood sugar level. Eat whole grains instead of white bread/pasta to limit your sugar intake. Include fruit and veg with every meal to help keep you healthy. Avoid eating an hour before bed to help your sleep. Do bodyweight exercises like planks daily to strengthen your core. Go for a walk every day to get some vitamin D. Do jumping jacks daily to maintain your cardiovascular fitness. Do stretches before bed to help you sleep better. Practice daily gratitude to keep you happier. Compliment others to fill your bucket. Keep a Bullet Journal to get those thoughts out of your head. Avoid watching the news ...

A question Guess how much of amount of your happiness that is caused by what you do. (a) 0% (b) 25% (c) 50% If you answered 50% give yourself a gold star. In case you are wondering, 40% of the rest of your happiness comes from simply deciding to be happy. Imagine what would happen if some of those habits also happened to be actions that contributed to your happiness! You could be automatically happy every day!!  Why be happy? If you aren’t sure if it’s worth the effort to be happy, let me give you a WIIFM (What’s In It For Me.) Well first off, researchers from Warwick University in England found that happier workers were 12% more productive than average and unhappier workers were 10% less productive than average. Researchers from the University College London found that happier people have greater protection against heart disease and stroke. A study in Milwaukee that the happiest people lived nine years longer than the least happy ones. So by being happy, not only will you e...

Can email make you happier? The average person sends and receives 130 emails a day according to a 2014 survey. Many of those will be along the lines of “Can you do this” or “why haven’t you done this” or “your credit card payment is due.” Not exactly messages that will put a smile on your face. Using email to boost happiness. You can actually use email to boost happiness by sending 3 specific emails a day. These messages are designed to help you focus on the positive and build stronger relationships. ‘Complimentary’ email First, when you get in to work in the morning, send a quick email to someone complimenting them on something specific. This does a few things – firstly, it gets you into the mindset of looking for good in the world. Focusing on good has been shown to increase happiness. Secondly, it will help strengthen your relationship with the person. Strong personal relationships have also been linked to happiness. Last, but not least, you will have done a small good deed by...

Happy New Year! New Years Eve is the most common time of the year for people to decide they want to make changes in their lives. It’s a brand new year and a fresh start. Indeed a recent survey found more than 50% of all adults make new years resolution. Sadly, several studies have found that less than 10% of people stick to their resolution for more than two months. There are two main reasons people give up. First, they don’t make their resolution SMART. Second, they don’t make their resolution a habit. Let me give you one common example – “I want to lose weight.” How much weight do you want to lose? When do you want to lose the weight by? Is that realistic? How are you going to lose the weight? What habits are you going to change? How are you going to ensure you are successful? SMART goals SMART goals are a tool used in business that can help us create new years resolutions. A SMART goal is: Specific. Measurable. Achievable. Relevant. Time-bound. For a goal to have a good...

Korean POWs American solders held as prisoners of war by North Korea in the 1950’s had the highest death rate of any war (38%.) After the war was over the Army conducted research to find out why. They found that prisoners were well fed, they had good housing, they reported low rates of physical abuse and torture and they weren’t even fenced in with barbed wire. What the researchers found was the solders were subjected to large amounts of psychological abuse. Solders were made to criticize each other, positive emotional support was purposely withheld and personally relationships were deliberately broken. Fill Your Bucket Inspired by these findings Don Clifton and Tom Rath realized how powerful focusing on a persons faults could be. They decided to look in to what happens if you focus on what is right. They ended up writing a best selling book called “Fill Your Bucket.” The basic idea is each one of us has an invisible bucket which is constantly filled or emptied based on what we say...

Why are some people happier than others? Research has found that 40% of a person’s happiness comes from their choice to be happy, 50% comes from their actions and 10% is unaccounted for. The happiest people make the choice to be happy and they also proactively take steps to be happy. Several studies have shown that happy people exercise regularly, they get fresh air and sunshine often, they cultivate good relationships daily, they smile and they express gratitude frequently. I combined these findings to create the idea of a “Good Walk.” A “Good Walk” is a simple idea that anyone can use to help cultivate their own happiness. It doesn’t require any special equipment, it doesn’t cost anything to do, and it is based on scientific research. Step 1: Take a good walk   The first component of a ‘Good Walk’ is going outside and taking a walk. Walking outside provides fresh air, sunshine and exercise – all proven to make people happier. Walking is an activity that almost anyone can do wi...

Mental health The Center for Disease Control estimates that nearly 50% percent of Americans will develop at mental illness during their life. Studies show that anxiety, depression and stress are all on the rise in America. There are physical things you can do to help support your mental health though. IMPORTANT: If you feel extreme sadness or anger or have feelings of self harm you should seek mental health help immediately. It is no worse to seek medical attention for a mental condition than it is a physical condition such as a cold. Exercise Physical exercise has been shown to ease depression, anxiety and numerous other mental health conditions. A 10 minute walk in natural can boost a persons mood for up to 2 hours! Just 20 minutes of exercise lowers stress levels measurably. After only 7 minutes of physical activity the happy endorphin chemicals are released in to the body. You can go for a “good walk” with the sole intention of being happier or you can use walking to get fit...

I wish I could read more When I was 10 years old I would read in bed for an hour every night before I went to sleep. Now, as a 40- something year old, I am lucky if I read for an hour a month. It turns out I am not alone. One of the top five resolutions every year that people make is to “read more books.” Often we read a lot as children but as we get older we gradually lose the reading habit. “I am too busy.” “I am too tired when I get home from work.” “I keep forgetting to go to the library.” These are all excuses we tell ourselves. Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body Reading isn’t just entertainment. It has a host of benefits. Mental stimulation.   Staying mentally stimulated can help reduce the chances of Alzheimers and dementia. Stress reduction.   Reading a good story can take you away from the stresses and strains of real-life. Gain knowledge.   Books can teach you new information that can help you in your job and your life. Increased vocabulary...

When I was younger I used to think that mindfulness was some hippy rubbish my Mum used to do at yoga retreats. It turns out that there is truth to the saying “the older you get, the wiser your parents become.” As I have learned more about it I have discovered that mindfulness is a useful skill in all parts of your life. Mindfulness is defined as “a state of active, open attention on the present.” In fact one of the most mindful people I have ever known was an ex-Special forces member named Chris I used to work with in my aviation days. His awareness was amazing. In the pub he was always looking around to see who might cause trouble (so we could leave before it started), driving through a busy street he was looking for where a child might run out in-between parked cars and in the office at work he was like Radar from MASH – he always knew when the boss was coming before he entered the room! Science supports the idea of mindfulness too. When you are being mindful at work you are “sing...

Why should you keep a journal? Some of the most important people in history have kept journals. Albert Einstein, Marie Curie, Mark Twain, Charles Darwin, Thomas Edison and Leonardo di Vinci. These journals have been tremendously helpful for historians in getting an insight in to how these people worked. Even if you don’t think you will end up in the history books along with Albert Einstein of Leonardo di Vinci, journalling can be an incredibly valuable practice. Journalling is a great way to exercise the creative muscle, it can also be rather cathartic. Benefits of journaling A study published in the Advances in Psychiatric Treatment found that writing about traumatic or stressful was found to improve both physical and psychological health. Participants were asked to write about these challenging events for 15–20 minutes on 3–5 occasions. Those who did so had better physical and psychological outcomes than those who wrote about neutral topics. A study in the cancer publication th...

The power of gratitude In 2009 after our second round of IVF my wife became pregnant with twins. In the fourth month of pregnancy we went for the regular ultrasound to make sure everything was progressing well. Sadly we learnt that one of the boys was healthy but the other had a serious birth defect called Anencephaly. If he lived to full term then he would only be with us for a few hours at most. We were then referred to the High Risk Pregnancy Team at our hospital. We were assigned a Genetic Counselor who explained my sons condition and what our options were. We saw a Palliative Care Doctor (something you never expect to have to do when you are having a baby). We enrolled in the Birthing Centers Bereavement Program. (It never occurred to me that a birthing center would have one, but they do and they are very good._ My son Sam ended up living for 3 days in the end. I adopted an attitude of gratitude early on in our journey. I was grateful that we knew in advance so we could prepare...

“I don’t want school to end.” As I write this we are in the last week of school for my kids. My daughter is leaving Elementary school and moving up to Middle school. When I put her to bed last night she said “I don’t want school to finish.” It’s understandable, she goes to a great school, she has some great friends and loves learning new things. Can you always be happy? Over the years I have written quite lot about happiness and the power of positive thinking. I truly believe happiness is a good thing. (There is even some science that suggests it is too!) From time to time people will ask me “can you always be happy?” The answer, I believe, is no, you can’t always be happy (and its probably not healthy to be happy all the time either.) However, I equally think you probably shouldn’t always be sad all the time either. Everything comes to an end. I explained to my daughter that everything comes to an end. Or, to put it another way, this too shall pass. If you are going through a h...

Some inspiration for a happiness habit Are you unhappy? Would you like to make happiness a habit. Here are 100 habits guaranteed to make you happier! Choose to have a good day. Get a good night’s sleep. Be screen free for an hour before bed. Read a chapter from a positive book before work. Read a positive\motivational blog post before work. Listen to a positive\inspiring podcast while you eat your breakfast. Listen to a positive audio book on your commute. Learn something new. Listen to upbeat music while you get ready. Turn off the TV news. Have a good, healthy, breakfast. Exercise before you go to work. Get your lunch ready the night before. Get your clothes ready the night before. Clean the snow off a neighbor’s car. Help a colleague carry a heavy load into the office. Send an email compliment when you get into work. Call someone just to wish them a “good daisy.” Put a nice note in a significant others lunchbox. Send someone a nice text message. Leave a surprise donut on someone’s...